Do you want to go to such and such place or do you want to go to the other? Do you feel like eating Greek or Thai or at home? Would you like to schedule a time for now or then?
When I’m with someone and I ask any of these questions I really do want some feedback, an opinion, a suggestion, some help in deciding. Because two or more individuals are obviously involved in the scenario, this is diplomatic behaviour, to ask the question, to want to involve the other person in a final decision. It is open for discussion, so discuss! That’s democracy.
So then it’s no surprise it exasperates me when I ask those questions of someone I’m with and instead of some constructive input a volley of ‘I don’t know, whatever, I’m easy, where, what, when do you want to…?’ is trolled out.
C’mon, I offered some choices for crying out loud – help narrow things down!
I’ve come to the conclusion that those responses of ‘I don’t care, whatever, I’m easy’ are tactics in handing over control, sending the message of not wanting to commit. It could even be an act of passive aggression. It means evading any responsibility to the outcome of the decision.
Not wanting to risk making a “bad” decision and take the blame, especially if it doesn’t pan out as hoped. Like if a restaurant I may have suggested turned out to serve horrid tasting dog mash on a plate. Could be countered with, “Why did you pick that restaurant?”
Worse yet is the ‘Whatever, I’m easy’ person who complains and blames if all didn’t go according to your decision ( because remember, they didn’t give any input), proving many times that they aren’t as ‘Whatever, I’m easy’ as they propose to be, truth be told.